what did you want to be when you were little, teenager, now?

I think about what I wanted to be when I was little and the answer is simple – a policeman. As I got older as a teenager it swithced to being a professional musician and playing concerts. Finally when reality hit in when I was around 21 I knew being a policeman had such much responsibility and rules. As for being a rockstar I just didn’t have the talent or discipline to constantly play my guitar, keyboards, and Dj equipment. Also my friends that were talented musicians never granted me enlightenhood into any of their bands so I would get better and stay motivated. Lastly once I became a real adult with some responsibilities and was active in business I knew that poor people can get rich and have a sweet life. What I’m finding out still everyday is that is does take a lot of effort and support to strike a great deal that makes you successful in business. I always founding trading stocks as something I have control of and could declare my own destiny. I’m still finding it hard to actually be a disciplined, managed, and focused trader. This probably one of the reasons I’m still a little poor bastard and pathetic sounding around women. I guess if you are a guy and you aren’t really great at anything your confidence level must be getting lower and lower the older and older you get.

Now I’m not saying I haven’t gotten experiences. I’ve gotten a lot of them, but that’s about it. I have learned a lot about how to manage, run, and market a business, but just not one that’s actually made any money. I’ve also learned how to follow stocks, understand candlesticks/emotions, and read the news but I’m still losing tons of money each year. My dad made a point that like I mentioned above “you have 100% control being a trader”. That statement is very true. You have the power to buy, hold, and sell at 99% of the time (unless the market is closed/closed due to crazy event). The fact is though if you can control the bigger factors like your emotions and brain focus being a successful wealthy traders shouldn’t be out of your control. So I guess that gives me hope as a little guy.

Well so far I’ve paid of 25% of my debt on the repairs on my new place I’m living which will eventually be rented out. I’m pretty sure within 2 more months I will have paid off the remaining 75% or total of $8,500. The big one I REALLY want to pay off is my student loan I used for investment that went bad which is currently $43,000 @ 12%/30 years. Fuck. I’m really going to need to focus on my trading to pay it off quickly within the next year.

So I’m interested in what you wanted to be 10-20-30 years ago and what you are doing now. Is it something you want to do?